10 Simple and Sensible New Year Resolutions

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Too many set goals for the new year as some sort of fresh start, the new beginning, angst of the dawn of a new day. But to only attempt it, with good intentions try and stay sworn, get a fifth of the way there and realize you should have just stuck to something easy or less demanding. Sound familiar? Simple solution, don’t give up the new year giving up your worst habit. Chances are you took a while to obtain it, it might take a while to kick it. So try something else instead, like my tactic. If it is already an action I’m required to do, let’s see how good I am at doing it.

New year goal 1: Brush your teeth every day before bed and when you wake up. Just do it. The dentist tells you to. Your mom tells you to. So why not help yourself and set your goal to do something you are for sure benefiting from. That would absolutely be a year of no cavities or tartar.

New year goal 2: Read a new book every month. Now not all of us read but this could be anything that you are obsessed with. Maybe it’s buying a CD once a month if you’re into music, get to know a new artist and support their talent. Or it can be, get a magazine once a month and clip out what inspires you, get a vision board going the whole year long. Whatever your vice, just do it more, get good at it and enjoy it more often.

New year goal 3: Take a walk for 30 minutes every day. Perhaps you don’t have 30 minutes, but I bet you have 10 at least 3 times a day. So split it up. Take a brisk walk around the building at work when others do cigarette breaks. Or do it once in the morning before work, at lunch, then after dinner. However, you get moving just get moving more. This has more benefits than any one doctor could explain. You cut your risk of disease more than in half. Start young and you’re setting a path of mindful living.

New year goal 4: Make your bed every day. I was told by a teacher once that successful people leave their home with their bed made every morning and their sink empty of dishes. Not sure how accurate, but it taught me a few things. When you are tired and stressed and the day is finally up. It’s nice to come home and hit the hay knowing there isn’t a book lying in your path ready to remind you of homework, or some pile of laundry edging you to get it folded. You can breathe for that moment and the day has a silver lining.

New year goal 5: Have a night where there is no technology. Call it your “off day” or me and my man have “no tech Tuesday”. This allows you to appreciate the little things. Give time to those around you not just those on hand in your gadget. The ones near happen to be the most important, so take one day a week to show that you can put what matters most in your life, first. There are 6 more days a week you can tweet the president or facetime your BFF.

New year goal 6: Eat one or two meals cooked at home. The amount of which you do this could vary like for me; I go out only once a week so all my meals must be cooked at home. But I know in my younger twenties it wasn’t so. You train yourself now and it gets easier as you get older to feed yourself, and soon more mouths.

New year goal 7: Every day say out loud 1 new thing you are grateful for. This one comes from Ryan, blogger of officialryguy.com. He has an alarm set at a certain time each day, that when it goes off it reminds him to sit and think of just one thing that day he was thankful for. To ensure he never took for granted even the most simple of things. He said it got pretty hard at times trying to come up with something better or meaningful. But that even if it was having the clothes on his back or the toilet paper he bought, he was thankful that it was there for his pleasure.

New year goal 8: Start recycling!! This is my most important life rule: reduce your carbon footprint to ensure our children’s lives. I can’t begin to explain the power of donating your trash to become something twice or even 3 times used. Once something gets sent to a landfill there it sits for its long, nondecaying life, taking up space and producing a massive collection of waste overall. The more you recycle, reuse and reduce, the better you are making this planet we call home. Donate items, collect cans for cash, or stop throwing out your plastic bags and use them for one of these ideas. Whichever you choose you will make an impact on this earth and secure our place here for that much longer

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New year goal 9: Help others by volunteering or support a charity. There is a list of ways this can be done. Here are some great ways to get started.

  • To help animals in your area or donate to no-kill shelters all around. https://www.aspca.org/ways-to-give
  • You can give a monetary donation or find a local food bank near you and help the hungry. http://www.firstfoodbank.org/
  • There are many sites like this but specifically, you can donate to a child here in the US or around the world, without leaving your home. Easy enough? So, go try it! http://www.savethechildren.org
  • This is a great site for knowing what is going on in the world and who needs help after natural disasters. Check back with them frequently to see what you can do to give a lending hand. http://www.directrelief.org/participate/
  • If none of these hit your heart strings you can always look at rankings and which charities give the most without profit through this amazing site. I couldn’t believe how many ways you can reach out to people in need. http://www.charitynavigator.org/

New year goal 10: Take some time each day for yourself. I do a quick meditation, which is hard for most but it takes practice. You will get it if you keep trying. I started by using binaural beats to drown out my thoughts, then it got easier to shut out the world for 10-minutes at a time. Take a bath one day or lay while listening to your favorite song on repeat. However, you choose to make some “me time” make sure its self-love you are practicing. Make it wholesome.

Ever hear the phrase ” It takes 21 days to form a habit.”? Well, it actually has been thought that you could possibly form a habit in that amount of time, but only if the task is as simple as drinking more glasses of water a day. Otherwise, harder things like eating a piece of fruit every day or taking a 10-minute walk after breakfast could take 68 or even 258 days, but these are all under 365 days of the year. So if you can get this year in your grasp and take each day one goal setting day at a time. You can make your life that much better with these habits, rather than poor life choices you constantly forget to change. Setting a goal is about making a better you. If you forget, don’t put yourself down, pat yourself on the back and just pick up where you left off. Keep going it’s only 2016!!!

Humour Me: Comedy Styles

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I would say I have a pretty good sense of humor. All though, being funny and finding others funny are very different things. This blog is the result of a thought, about just that. Types of comedy. At times, I avoid some kinds of people’s funny because I don’t understand it. But just because you don’t understand their jokes, does not mean you need to knock it. Try it first, then use your funny bone to throw one at them.

Sarcasm is not my second language. Mostly because I am naive and gullible, but living in the city has taught me one thing. screenshot-www.google.com 2015-03-19 17-50-58Roll with the punches and you might even get to roll with the laughs. What honestly gets me about people who use sarcasm, is that they tend to go too far with it. Whether you’re the young pubescent trying to stereotype yourself into cool, or you’re the over zealous vaunter trying to schmooze yourself a date. It always comes off as being kinda rude… Don’t ya think? It is just not my cup of tea. But someone somewhere will love you for it, so keep trying.

demetrimartinDry humor is more my kind of funny. Someone who won’t laugh at their own jokes or tells blan stories that still hook you because of delivery. Examples like Demetri Martin or Jillian Bell from workaholics; their character roles and stand up can give you such a pleasing source for entertainment and laughter. It’s how some great comedians have got where they are today.

Crude-ness is the new black. I think I might make a shirt that says that. Then sell it at every Dane Cook or Daniel Tosh comedy show. Or better yet a Lewis Black show! These guys nail it. I mean if you can get away with being a dick and saying what you want then more power to you… Just hope the money and fame last while the humor still sits right with the people. Soon they will catch on though… Come to the dark side we have chocolate covered bananas.

Then there is absurd randomness and asinine foolery that can make just about anything funny. Honestly, it could be the hasheesh speaking or the dumbing and numbing of our poor society, but who doesn’t enjoy a little mindless entertainment. It can go back to The Three Stooges, or be as cultured as South Park. Stupid is funny. When I get stupid with my boyfriend, that is some of the best times we have together. Where we can be completely unguarded and truly hilarious we get to connect on a whole different level. Try it sometime. Just let go any stupid quip that comes to your head and see who will play along.

There seems to be an awful lot of puns going around today and I sometimes feel like I don’t catch it. Like that hand gesture, where your hand flies over your head like an airplane going right over and you missed it. That’s me. So I kindly laugh and accept I can’t get punchlines all the time.  I just read a tumblr puns article, and I got about 10 out of the 15. Maybe it’s because you have to know the reference to get it, but it just feels like a third wheel situation. So smile and wave boys, smile and wave.smileandwave

Association’s and metaphors: this is my most played card but probably my weakest hand. All my friends tell me my metaphors are down right awful right next to the invention of the egg minder wink app; just read some of the comments on this gadget you will thank me for this! This comical aspect gives me the sense I’m still doing good and being funny while doing it. Not only that, but I also am receptive to it more because it pertains to me. That’s how you get people to like you, correlate with your audience. As for metaphors, maybe you should ask a professional because as I learned from my dad this past holiday, we can’t tell a metaphorical joke to save our hide. Got that from him too and my sick sense of humor.

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Quick Guide to Natural Energy, or Chi

earthenergyEnergy; defined by wikipedia, is the property of objects, transferable among them via fundamental interactions, which can be converted into different forms, but not created or destroyed. It goes on to state that, wherever energy is present it has the same qualities no matter its form. In my day to day I work with energy. Not the type of energy that you can run your car off of or light your house up with. I am talking about the energy we all have inside of us. We take from the earth’s energy, and give back to it the very same kind, just now in a different form. If you have ever watched the movie Avatar then you might be able to grasp the kind of energy I’ll explain in my post. If you would like to feel first hand what I am going to describe, let us begin with finding your own energy. Give yourself a good 10 min to really get through the whole exercise. Start by resting comfortably, preferably somewhere quiet, as if you are going to meditate. In fact, that is very well what you are going to practice. A sort of meditation to really reach down and discover your own potential energy. Take some deep breaths. I want you to take your thumb and place it right in between your other hand’s thumb and forefinger. Do not press, just simply lay your hands across each other and feel with only your thumb. Try to let go all other thoughts that come to your mind. Focus on feeling.

How do you know what you are feeling? Is it energy or just a pulse? Energy can be felt many different ways. Some can feel heat, others vibrations, and can even be pulse like or wavy. No matter what you begin to feel, as soon as you pick up on something different than what you were feeling before (that pulsing), more than likely that is the energy being present. You know what a pulse feels like, right? It is the same feeling of your heart beating through your chest. The pulse beats right through the body. So now focus on any other sensation you can harness. I always notice my hands start to warm up, my pulse begins to fade away and I am left with the feeling of energy being transferred between my two hands.

What if you do not feel anything or it is almost undetectable? This is a case of insufficient flow of energy. Sometimes we build up energy in an area and that can cause energy to lack some where else. So in the instance of barley feeling anything, we would want to work on bringing the energy throughout you. It can be simple for some, but in the event that you are deficient, you may need some energy work done by a professional to really get the flow going. Otherwise, focus on relaxing all your muscles one by one letting go of any hold they may have on you. Let go of your tightness and feel the tension leaving your body. See if by simply depressurizing your upper body your energy is now shifting. It is your intention that will lead you to what you are looking for.

Energy, or in chinese medicine chi, can be pretty complicated if you do not have a clue what to look for. But it can also make the world of a difference when it is balanced within the body. I practice moving energy to help alleviate some of the toughest pain that people have to deal with on the daily. We do not create the energy and put it back into you. We simply take from the earth, its energy, and simply help push it through, creating a new healthy and balanced force. For more on chi and its understanding check out http://www.skepdic.com/chi.html, where they give a defintion that might make it more contextual for you. Also for more exercises on chi go to http://www.qienergyexercises.com/qi.htm for a more eastern practice of this. Leave any comments or questions and I will be happy to answer them to the best of my knowledge. Thanks!

Friends are the Family You Can Choose

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As the saying goes “You can’t choose your family.” Thankfully, you can however choose your friends. With that instance comes some of the worst and best decisions you have made and will make. As we grow older we realize that it is better to have fewer friends that are near and dear, then having a ton of acquaintances you could quickly forget. I have moved so much in my life that it has been nearly impossible to keep life long friends. With technology and social media though, I will say that I have now been reconnected with friends I grew up with. But even then, they are not the type of friendships I am talking about.

The kind of friendships you will hold on to and cherish forever are the ones that come with honesty and integrity. The people you will keep around are those that have values that hold up to your own. They will respect you and the choices you make, but will also let you know when you could be headed down a dark path. Only will a true friend stand up and speak out in those tough times where you hit a fork in the road and do not see a near bright future. They can help you battle your demons. They are willing to sacrifice some of their own time and even funds to help get you out of even your stickiest situations.

It doesn’t matter the time or space between you, when you come together it is like nothing has changed. All you have is a bunch of talking and catching up to do. Even when you bring additions to the family, by getting in a serious relationship or bringing a new baby to the world, they are instant family as well. You get called Auntie or Uncle just for being an important person in their kids’ lives. The value of the relationship just grows over time.

They will encourage you more than your own family will. It is in their interest to keep you happy and living well because that directly affects them and their life as well. They realize this and make it a life together worth building. Just like a partner, you’re in a relationship with your best friends. Meaning you will have some hard times to go through together but on the other side your bond will only get stronger with each turning tide.

One of the hardest part of having friends is knowing when you need to let go. Not every person you form a bond with will stay glued to your hip like once was. There are people who you will grow apart from. Their values will differentiate from yours and you will no longer see the benefit of keeping them around. At times the friendship leaves you feeling hurt and mistreated, or like you don’t belong together. This could be the start to a failing friendship. Recognize when a friendship is hurting your own life and try to express these feelings before it becomes damaging. Take caution when choosing your forevers.

There are about a thousand different ways to say what a true friend is.  All I can say for sure is, friendship is something you feel with your heart and believe in wholeheartedly. Together till the end and forever in my thoughts will all the precious souls, who made an impact in my life, stay. I dedicate this post to all the BFFs who make the world a more friendlier place.

Peace, Love and Rock & Roll
Peace, Love and Rock & Roll

Dating Tips for the Anxious

how-to-build-a-lasting-relationshipFinally settling down in my mid-twenties makes me look back and think on what I did that had life holding me on edge til now. As the baby announcements and wedding invitations roll in, a lot of us “late-bloomers” are left feeling, well, a little left behind. Why did we get started so late? How did we end up with the wrong one too many times? If I don’t find someone now, will there be any one left? Fear not my lovely dears, life is what you make it. This is all part of the same feelings you got when in Jr. High or High School. It’s called peer pressure. Only this time your in your twenties and your internal alarm clock is ringing every ten minutes because you keep hitting snooze. But here are my tips to ease into the long road ahead:

  1. Time is on your side. There is no set plan or schedule you need to stick to for having the perfect family life. So get blessed early on and some get time to really search out all options. Don’t let others pressure you into believing you need babies and a partner to feel complete at this time in life. Also, someone once told me, “Look at it this way, you will have many babysitters to choose from when you eventually do have kids!”.
  2. Don’t fear the online dating game. It’s not your best tool but it can help you improve. Some dates you know won’t go any where, so use that as a learning lesson. Other times you will find the most gracious of all dates but realize fancy just isn’t your forte. Either way find out what you like and start there.
  3. Don’t treat every love affair as a one of a kind. Or at least keep that to yourself and believe it. Not every connection will be everlasting. Learn to know the difference. Lust, Love and everything in between will dance like magic in front of your eyes. To see through the smoke and mirrors you must know what you want and who you are. Until then just safeguard your heart.
  4. Save your best cards for last. If you come into a game with all the best suits for the viewing… There won’t be much element of surprise for later. Keeps them coming back when you can hold back some and keep them guessing.It makes me think back to this book I read Why Men Love Bitches… which puts everything in nice to read graphs on how to know when to play the right cards.
  5. Trust your instincts. You can read every self help book or Google every tip on how to date. But when you get down to dating if it doesn’t feel right don’t do it. Also, don’t take every person’s advice. Look how their love life is, are they #1 Casanova?
  6. Find a mutual weirdness. We all know that some tendencies we acquired don’t necessarily yell, “Hottest trophy piece!”. Look for someone who will still love those things about you. (or at least put up with them) I believe there is someone for everyone. Just keep your heart open and your mind free of judgement.

“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” – Dr. Suess

Also as a final note. Have some standards but do not raise them to high. Know your worth and have confidence in who you are. This will attract the one you will want to spend the rest of your life with. Opposingly, please do not push potential away with your high standards either. People are capable of great things and most the time we are just waiting for our other half to complete our whole self. If given a chance that crooked smiling, glasses-wearing, nerdy, lanky, nice guy could make one hell of a fairy tale ending for you.

Just for Today

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Just for today I will live in today. I will not try and take on all my problems at once and see today for its real worth.

Just for today I will not allow the negatives of the world around me affect my being. There is good all around, open your eyes and believe.photo-02

Just for today I will give thanks. Thanks for just being alive. Thanks to those who make this world a better place to live.

Just for today I will let be what is. There is things you can not change and things that will just happen. Take notice and be kind to what comes.

Just for today I will love myself truly. I will not self sabotage. When I look into a mirror I will see beauty in all different ways.

Just for today I will help others find happiness in the day. You can change someones day around just with a simple smile or hug.

What will you do today to become a stronger, better you?

When You Know You’re with the Right Person

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Finding the right one is never easy. But when you do you definitely know. I have found a few things that make my relationship feel like a dream come true.
They will adopt your family and pets as their own. Nothing says “I will be with you long-term” as much as  seeing your siblings bonding with your significant other. Or watching your dog and lover take a sweet snuggle nap on the couch. You can keep them if they know how to make the family dream work!
They will put down the technology to just be with you. We get so caught up in our technology that time to time it feels like it becomes our greatest activity. In our home we adopted a No Tech Tuesday; when we are home together we put the technology away and do activities outside of electronics. Whether it be video games, t.v., or the phone; if your babe can put it away for the day I say it’s real.
You pretty much have the same eating habits. Not every relationship works this way, but I would say it is ten times easier cooking for someone who eats they way I do. You don’t have to go out of your way to make a specially designed meal. And if you do get separate  groceries perhaps you have that much more love to go into the pot.
Even things that perturbed you in past relationships won’t even phase you with this one. This could be anything from bad habits to not so endearing looks… You love every ounce of that being.
Alone time spent together = the best time spent. There is something about doing the hobbies you love to do and still having the comfort of company around you. You are both involved in your own activity yet still being consciously paired up in a way.
The weirdest traits of yours are their traits too. Stopping to pick up rocks that interest me might seem odd to few but to me it’s my favorite pastime.  My companion happens to hunt for rocks like a miner which makes this geologist nerd happy!
The fights are never long and are few and far between. I have been told it is healthy to fight. This is not my style. I talk things out, walk away and then convene for closing argument statements at the end. Finding someone with the same style of dealing with frustration helps the relationship stay steady. Also, never go to bed angry. No matter how many times you hear it, it is sooooo true!
The support never runs dry. You build each other up. You become  each other’s muse. It feels so right. Every dream, every goal and every idea is shared and nurtured with the same t.l.c. that brought you two close. Team work makes the dream work!
So go be a team player and tell your special somebody you are lucky to have them till the end of time. If they are the right one.